I can honestly say I had no idea what I was getting into when I got pregnant with my daughter Mia. It was definitely planned, but we didn't know it would happen so fast! Over the 9 months of her growing inside me you try to prepare for everything - becoming a parent, learning all the new and hip techniques to get your baby to sleep - making sure everything is all set up in the nursery - but one tip of advice I can give to new parents is YOU CAN'T PREPARE!
Yes, of course you can prepare by purchasing clothes, setting up the nursery and sitting through prenatal classes - but they can give you as many fake babies as possible and scenarios - and those won't happen in real life!
I had a very rough labour with Mia. Four days of pre-labour with contractions all through the day/night, but not enough to be in "active labour". I think we saw the hospitals maternity department 3 times before I was in "active labour". I was so exhausted and frustrated with the hospital sending me home - I really didn't want to go back because I thought they would send me home again! I didn't think I would be kissing my good sleep goodbye four days before the baby arrived!
December 22 is when Mia was born. I laboured since 1:00 that morning, got to the hospital at 7:00am, doctor broke my water, I laboured, was put on oxytocin, I laboured, laughing gas, fentanyl and an epidural later... Still labouring.... Now it's time to push... 9:00pm.... I push... Nothing... I push.. nothing... Mia's heartbeat is sitting between 180-215 beats per minute.... It's now 10:30pm.... Then 11:00pm.... Doctor calls pediatrician to come... Time to vacuum suction her head out... Doctor tells us the risks... We have no choice... The sound of a suction cup.... Still nothing... then again... still nothing... I see the doctor with scissors... oh $H!T (pardon my French).... 4th degree tear/cut episiotomy.... baby is yanked out... no crying... doctor cuts the cord... rushes away to work on baby... I'm left to bleed. What is minutes feels like hours... I hear my babies cry... relief. Time of birth 11:41am....
No one tells you how to react after a traumatic birth like that - but everyone pretends like it doesn't happen...
First night home - December 24th. My husband and I are not sure what to expect when it's bedtime, but honestly I don't think either one of us slept. Our newborn continues to cry throughout the night in her bassinet. She hates it. My milk hasn't come in yet. She's hungry. We have no idea what to do - so what do you do when you don't know what to do... GOOGLE! (just joking I learned in the end it's call your mother).
Over the first few nights we tried nursing her to sleep, rocking her to sleep, but in the end she wanted to be close to us. I would nurse her to sleep in our bed - and when she was asleep would move her to her bassinet. If she was being fussy, my husband and I would both take turns trying to get her back to sleep. We also found that if she was swaddled - she felt safe and comfortable - and would go to sleep without a fuss. People will tell you what to do and what not to do - but in the end it's up to you and your partner - and what works!
When Mia was three months - we transitioned her to her own room in her own crib. We also started to unswaddle her arms in the Halo Sleepsack (they're amazing). We moved her because she didn't have enough room in her Halo Bassinest and she was such a loud sleeper - I was kept up throughout the night checking on her. To get her to sleep we used a music machine that plays three different songs. She loved it.
To this day Mia goes to bed between 9-9:30pm - is wrapped up in her halo sleepsack - and falls to sleep with her Giraffe WubbaNub and music machine. She doesn't wake up until between 7-9am! Honestly people need to try what works for them. But in our case - this is what worked for us.
Even after all the hell I went through above - I wouldn't change a thing. I love my little Mia to death! Hell, I'm even thinking of having another one.... Not soon.... :)
About the blogger
Alyssia is Kim's 25-year old daughter. She's also Mia's mom!